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Wednesday, June 8, 2011

week 35

dearest little bean,

you are not so little anymore! you are the size of a honeydew and probably about 18 inches long. whew.

papa and i are getting more and more things done around the house preparing for your arrival. this week we are tackling the bedroom. your mama is not a fan of painting. it is so tedious! there's paint splattered all over the floor bc we're going to paint the floor white so we didn't think we should bother with a drop cloth. 

i've been finding that my mother hen instincts extend beyond nesting. someone had asked me how my emotions have changed; do i really cry at little things like people say pregnant women do? well, yes, i do. but i did before i was pregnant. what i find has come about from carrying you around in my belly is this intense need to protect you and the family and world we are bringing you into and the time we have together. this translates into me being a little more direct with people who, well, might need a little more guidance. 

i am not sure i can put into words what i mean by this except that my patience is limited for rudeness and inconsiderate people. whereas before i might have been able to walk away, albeit frustrated, from an unfortunate situation with customer service, coworker, friend. now, i tend to say something. i suppose this doesn't look like it puts your mama in good light but i'll tell you, little bean, i've found that i've been able to do it in such a way that typically clears the air, cleans the slate, and allows everyone to move on with a more clear understanding of expectations. i'm not always good at this, as i'm sure you'll unfortunately discover as you get older. but i'm working on it. until then, don't mess with the pregnant lady.
i love you, little bean. i will always be your greatest advocate.


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